Jae:
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It's been five months since the last OAV, and things seem to be going rather
well for our two lovers.
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Bart:
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Define "well." I mean -- sure, they seem to be doing alright, but Keiichi
is a wuss. They've been together for five months, and it's obvious that
they're crazy about each other, but Keiichi still hasn't made his move. I'd
have made mine on the first night.
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Jae:
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well (wêl) n. 1. A deep hole or shaft dug or drilled into the earth
to obtain a natural deposit, as water or oil.
Okay, so they haven't done anything, which I'll concede is a bad thing, but
at least Belldandy hasn't killed Keiichi or left or anything. But as I said
last week, Keiichi's just naturally shy -- or as you put it, a wuss.
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Bart:
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OK, if that's the definition of "well" that you're using, you're definitely
wrong. They haven't even kissed yet, let alone done anything involving a
hole or a shaft.
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Jae:
|
AMG isn't that kind of show. That's more La Blue Girl or
Urotsukidoji, but you've got a point. Well, that's why tonight's
episode, Midsummer Night's Dream, introduces a brand new character to
the AMG universe...
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Bart:
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Urd, the Cupid of Love. She's got a couple screws loose, here and there.
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Jae:
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Only a couple? I always figured that she was a few bolts short of a
hardware store.
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Bart:
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I mean, imagine taking away Cupid's little bow and replacing it with a
wildly-inaccurate bazooka.
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Jae:
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Or SCUD.
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Bart:
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That too. Not only is she meddlesome, she's also over-powered and clumsy as
all hell. And hot.
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Jae:
|
Yeah, she is hot, I'll grant you that. In case you're one of the few in our
audience who's never seen this series before and has no clue as to what Bart
and I are talking about, Urd is Belldandy's older half-sister and meddler
extraordinaire. While Belldandy's a first class, second category, unlimited
license goddess, Urd is second class limited -- not for any lack of power,
but for a lack of control.
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Bart:
|
Anyway, Urd's little plans to get Keiichi and Belldandy together fail not
once, not twice, but three separate times over the course of the episode.
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Jae:
|
And at the heart of it all is the sinister Sayoko Mishima *crash of
lightning*. Okay, so none of it's her fault and she isn't that
sinister, but...
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Bart:
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...she's quite the bitch.
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Jae:
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Amen, brother.
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Bart:
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Of course, this isn't all bad. It's because of her and Urd that we get to
hear the bug zapper line.
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Jae:
|
Personally, I don't know if I've ever forgiven Sayoko for slapping
Belldandy. What about you? (and yeah, the zapper line is damn good)
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Bart:
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It's times like that that I wish Belldandy had more of a temper.
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Jae:
|
Yeah, but if she did, she might have... never mind. I won't spoil the
ending. Actually, she does have a temper... or so Urd claims...
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Bart:
|
Beware the wrath of a patient man (or woman, in this case). That isn't to
say that she ever actually gets angry in this episode, but if she did, well,
I don't think I'd want to be around. She's not a first class goddess for
nothing.
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Jae:
|
On a completely unrelated note: if you haven't noticed (and I'm sure you
haven't, as a lot of you walk out before seeing the credits), the artwork
for the closing credits changes each week, and it's all very well done. The
animation at the end of this week's article is pretty awesome, but keep an
eye out next week; that's my personal favorite.
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Bart:
|
Article? Don't you mean video? ...or are we going to do an animation? :)
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Jae:
|
Yeah... I meant video. Well, we could do animation if we got popular
enough, but it'd be rather expensive and time-consuming... That, and I can't
draw anything more complicated than a stick figure...
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Bart:
|
Same here...which is why I stick to writing fan-fiction.
|
Jae:
|
Hey, don't mention that! Not yet at least. *whisper* If you let
these guys know you write fanfics, they might burn you at the stake.
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Bart:
|
Why?
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Jae:
|
Well, I guess that just because 99.9% of the fanfics out there are
badly-written Ranma doesn't mean that they all are. After all, there
are a few well-written Ranma ones... But that's not the topic of
this article, AMG OAV 2 is.
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Bart:
|
Oh, right. OAV 2. Excellent OAV, I have to say. Lives up to the standards
set by the rest of them... and this one's even funny in places.
|
Jae:
|
In places? I'd go farther than that. It's extremely well done. Like when
Keiichi swallows as he watches the porn tape...
|
Bart:
|
Now that was an interesting scene.
|
Jae:
|
Oh yeah. Here's a question: I never understood what is up with anime guy
characters being in sexual situations and getting nosebleeds. Got any clue?
|
Bart:
|
As far as I know, it's a Japanese superstition.
|
Jae:
|
It seems a bit farfetched to me. *shrug* I guess it'll have to stay
in the X-Files file cabinet with the reasoning behind the school-girl
fetish that many Japanese men have.
|
Bart:
|
I dunno. I guess it's something you just sort of have to accept. I didn't
get it when I first started watching anime, but I guess I kinda just take it
for granted now. Personally, though, the only time I ever get nosebleeds in
sexual situations is when I get punched in the face.
|
Jae:
|
...or slapped.
|
Bart:
|
Happens more often than you might think. But I digress.
|
Next week: A new hurdle enters into Keiichi and Belldandy's
relationship, more of Belldandy's relatives decide to stop by, and Keiichi
pulls an all-nighter and proves that yes, he could make it here at
Cornell.
Bart:
|
And, of course, some completely unnecessary T&A shots. (wipes the blood
off his nose)
|
Jae:
|
Yeah, I'd have to say that you've been watching far too much anime. So,
I've finally run out of witty, semi-witty, and even plain stupid things to
say. How should we end this?
|
Bart:
|
Well, I've been called both witty and plain stupid, so I'll give it a shot.
Enjoy episode 2... and remember, if you get a nosebleed, tilt your head back
and breathe deeply through your mouth while holding a tissue to your nose.
|
Jae:
|
Actually, I've heard that tilting your head back's a good way to let the
blood run down your throat, harden, and choke you to death...
|
Bart:
|
Not true. Do you know how many male anime characters would be dead by now
if that were the case?
|
Jae:
|
Get it in your head! They're not alive! Anyway, enjoy the show and bye for
now.
|
Bart:
|
Peace.
|
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